Ever had one of those days? Apparently this guy is not doing so well. I am writing to get some comfort from all the moms reading this. My little child is making me crazy! In the last few days there has been an incident with super glue, tantrums in stores, she refuses to ride in the cart, writing on the wall paper in the kitchen with pen, and turning off my computer while I was working (unsaved of course). Will this ever end? Her favorite word is “no” (make that, NOOOOO, shouted at the top of her lungs). She even says no to things she wants, just because her little heart wants to be defiant.I am working hard at staying calm, training her in the way she should go, taking my own time-outs, but I just want to see a glimmer of hope that she will turn into a sweet little girl. This stubborn, strong-willed behavior started almost a year ago and it is getting worse, more public, more frustrating, and more tiring. The testing is almost constant.
I was thinking the other day as I watched my nephews who are only 1 year apart in age. There is a moment in time when you have your first baby and he/she is doing well, sleeping great and is cute as can be and you think, “This is wonderful, I want another one.” Now, if you miss this window of cute and cuddly baby-dom, you end up like me, wondering why in the world anyone would ever want another child after having a 2 year-old. There are always “oops, I got pregnant” moments, that I almost think are God’s way of getting us to procreate against our will. Otherwise, there would be a lot of one child families (like mine).
So, with all that said, you can stop asking me when I am having another one… I completely missed the window of cute and cuddly and am now in the NOOOOO phase.
6 comments:
Its hard to imagine our sweet little Emma asserting her independence so rudely! Her mommy was awfully stubborn and she turned out okay, altho I didn't take enough time outs. You wrote on walls and books and if I had had a computer I'm sure it would have been shut off. There is hope, But do consider the long term of a child with no siblings to have to share with :)
Too be honest I was softening about the whole "it's your duty to procreate thing"...maybe I'll pretend I didn't read this :) It's going to have to boil down "Oops we're pregnant" which isn't likely because I've heard the Atlantic Ocean is almost 100% effective as a form of birth control. :) You & Jeff our good disciplinarians, and as you well know "train up a child in the way he should go, when he is old he will not stray from it"...
I remember three little girls who, when together were only slightly mischievious, but when on their own could be...well...interesting. You've all turned out quite nicely. Also consider that a second child could be either a partner in crime or the distraction she needs.:-)
~Wanda
Our children (young and old) can be both a huge blessing and a tremendous heartache. But, in those ugly times when you just want to give up, try to remember how our heavenly Father is so faithful with us! He probably should have given up on me a long time ago, but He hasn't...thank goodness! Hang in there!
I can relate to strong-willed 2 year old behavior... and it's too late for me. I'm already over 5 months pregnant with another! PERHAPS though, the next one will be a little more compliant and not as strong willed?... there is always hope. Sometimes I have the thought - "well, the second one can't be any WORSE than this" (the strong willed behavior)... but then again I could be wrong.
Umm, my child just came up and hit me twice so I have to go "tend" to his dear, sweet, defiant, behavior issue now...
Read "The Strong-Willed Child" by Dr. James Dobson from Focus on the Family. I'm serious. READ IT. It helps me so much with my little boys, and was a life-saver when we had foster babies with reeeeally bad behavior issues. Back in the days when I did daycare for 7 little girls under the age of 5, I handed this book out to all the parents and said, "This is what I'm using here. Read it. Use the same tactics at home." It was the difference between night and day for all of us working together to raise these little girls. I really hope you'll read it. I've been where you are.
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