Friday, April 09, 2010

Following friends...

I am what you would call a slow friend maker. I've always been this way. With each new person I meet, it feels like an awkward first date. Am I laughing too much? I am not laughing enough? I can't seem to think of a single thing to say until I'm alone again. Why am I thinking of Abraham Lincoln right now? "It takes a long time to grow an old friend," someone wise once said. In most cases, the proverbial first date is followed by a second and pretty soon all the jitters are gone and I feel myself again and I have a new friend. I have few, but deep friendships.






My slow-friend-making issues are one of the many reasons I love to blog and I love to blog hop. I can skip the awkward first date and read the Cliff-notes on a person's life. I sure wish I could have had this social medium in high school. I remember my Junior year, new to the school, I was just getting comfortable with one or two people by Christmastime. Then a girl started attending school second semester. It took her 3 point 1 nano seconds to makes friends and be like "best buds" with every single person in the school. She obviously lived by the quote, "Strangers are just friends waiting to happen."



Now that I've shared my sob story, I have one more thing to point out that isn't fair. I've been blogging for nearly 5 years. 5 years! In that time, I've amassed 30 followers to this blog. I love you all dearly, really I do. But just a itsy-bitsy part of me wants to be one of the popular people.  I have a friend who reminds me of Miss Second Semester and her instant friend making abilities. She started blogging 3 months ago and take a guess at how many followers she has..... 62. Sheesh I say.



Sure she's funny. Sure she writes thought provoking things every day and has super cute kids. And sure she has great photography skills. Not to mention having over 600 friends on Facebook. I don't think I've even met 600 people in my whole life, let alone that many people who actually remember who I am. I am resisting putting her link because I know every single person reading this will skip right over my sniveling and go to her blog and become her follower instead of mine. And her friend on Facebook. My sister is her friend on Facebook. I asked how she new this uber-popular friend and she said, "Oh, you know, we sat next to each other at a wedding about 7 years ago." I am POSITIVE I've never made a friend that quickly.



"Anybody can sympathise with the sufferings of a friend, but it requires a very fine nature to sympathise with a friend's success."
- Oscar Wilde



I'm happy for you Joy (at joyfulquarels.blogspot.com) and all your 62-followers-in-3-months-success, really I am. Such a fine nature I have. I'm not envious at all. Not even a little.


signiture3


PS If you are interested in becoming a follower, just scroll down until you see "Followers" in the left column of this blog. Click "become a follower" and you are in. Your bank account will be drained, you will be reqired to comment on my blog and so on and so forth. Thanks for following!

19 comments:

Dan & Hillary said...

Our lives would be much easier if we lived in the same town:-) Making/keeping/deepening friendships is difficult and some days I wonder why I try. Thanks for hangin' in with me for the last 15+ years!

joyq said...

few things:

#1 I really did not know you don't make friends easily- I assumed we were pretty much twins in most ways

#2 you put me in your BLOG!!! Best day ever!

#3 of my 62 followers I am pretty sure at least 3/4 ths of them are my family.


I can't wait for my bank account be be drained- I have been a follower for quite awhile and it hasn't done that... or it has. Wit my account its hard to tell..

Kelleigh Ratzlaff Designs said...

You are so funny!! You may only have 30 Google Friend Connect followers, but you have 54 followers in Google Reader, and probably a lot more in other readers! I bet you have another 30 or so that you don't know about! PLUS, I've never used Friend Connect, and I've been reading your blog for a couple of years!!

Shawna said...

I tell myself, quality not quantity right?

Michelle Ross said...

SAME HERE. Hate the face to face first friendship jitters. Love the FB and blog 'cheating' we do that helps the ice break. I think the only people that can really tell that it is hard for us to make friends is.... us. I can't tell you how uncomfortable and draining social situations make me, but no one ever guesses.


This might brighten your day- I have 200 feeds on my bloglines account, and you + two others are the only ones I read on a daily/semi-daily basis.

Howdy Wave,
your Devoted Follower

mcpartlin said...

Alysun, I have enjoyed following your blog for about a year now. I didn't realize I needed to become a follower but I am now official. Although I have never met you I feel like you and I could be friends. I guess it helps that I have known the rest of the Peters family since 1999 when John and our oldest son played basketball together at Santiam Christian. We have also bought straw from the farm where you live and hay from the home place. I agree having and making a friend can be quite an ordeal. Anyway, love the blog and the beautiful family. You are truly blessed and very talented.

Jayne said...

as always, I walk away either encouraged or with a smile on my face after reading your posts!
Jayne

Mommy Zook said...

This post is so funny cause I was just telling Ashley how Great I think you are and how I bet you would be an awesome friend but how you are probably trying to stay ten feet from crazy Mindy!!!! Anyway I just became an official follower. Your blog is wonderful. I love your sense of humor and your amazingly adorable family. K. Don't think Im crazy now.

M. Cazin said...

So that is totally me! I feel social awkward around people for the first time as well. Actually I even had a dream about it last night. I am right there with you.

Grace said...

I've been a follower for forever and I've loved every second of it! I think you blog ROCKS!!! Besides, I owe every inch of my blogging survival to you!

Notorious M.E.G. said...

Haha, that's funny. I'm just glad you said it & not me :-)

Ok, but really, I feel ya. Making friends is hard work & I don't do it with ease or grace & I always wonder if I came off a little too strong, or too withdrawn & awkward. MOPS is a life saver, right? And what does a girl gotta do to get a few followers round here?!?! I could talk up your blog o my end if you'd like. Though I think 30 followers sounds great. If it makes you feel any better, I have like eight or something on mine, & only three on my new blog. My family & friends aren't really into the technology thing... :-)

Sara said...

I follow your blog (obviously), but not "officially." I just check my blog roll to see if you've updated and leave my official blog following "reading list" for my couponing/deal blogs - I feel like it would get to messy if I added all my friends' blogs to it.

I don't make friends quickly either and I'm also horrible at maintaining relationships. Since most of my food friends from high school have moved away, I have very few close friends anymore. Be very glad that at least you are able to maintain your relationships and have a few, deep friendships.

Sara said...

Um, that should read "good" friends, not "food" friends! Ha!

Kellie said...

I only have 10 followers if that makes you feel any better! And actually, I don't think I'm an "official" follower of your blog because I have you in my Google Reader. I love Google Reader! It lets me know when there's a new post so I don't have to obsessively check every blog I enjoy every day.

For what it's worth I totally know what you mean about being slow to form friendships. I definitely fall in that pattern, though I've been trying harder to be more open and outgoing. I've even practiced at improving my small talk skills with strangers at events where I don't know anyone since I figure I have nothing to lose. It's getting easier.

The Youth Pastor's Fam said...

and i was thinking 34 followers was good =). few, but deep friendships are the best so that tells me a lot about you!!

Peggy said...

I am right there with you Alysun. I agree with The Youth Pastor's Fam, Few but good friendships are the best.
By the way I am now an official Follower.

Notorious M.E.G. said...

OK, I'm curious, since I've heard both terms but thought they were the same up until now...what is the difference between being an official follower & being on a Google Reader? I need a lesson on blogging!

Anonymous said...

If you'd count me as a real life-in person friend, I'd be privileged. Kelsey ps-I can't be a follower yet because I don't have the right accounts set up.

Stacy said...

I also find making friends SO hard. Between moving and being trapped in the house with a 4yo, 2yo and newborn I feel like I have one adult conversation a day…with the dr's office receptionist.

While writing a blog post yesterday #2 asked if anyone even read my blog…I said I don't think so…

I really enjoy reading your blog, I love the learning farm life posts! I'll become a "follower"!